The always entertaining Josh Friedman:

The fact is, other than free sushi and a seven figure income, dressing like a sweaty fat Russian mobster is the single best part of being a multi-platinum-selling Hollywood screenwriter such as myself. That swish-swish sound your thighs make as you walk down the studio halls, the feeling of the polyester sliding on the black leather as you recline in the inevitable Eames chair and pop the top on your Diet Coke…

My God I’m getting Russian just thinking about it.

Because understand this: what you wear and how you look when you go to a meeting is of the utmost importance. Every interaction between a writer and an executive is a carefully orchestrated mating dance between power and creativity. It is Noh theater where every mask has been carved into a smile capable of four minutes of small talk about the newest Jon Krakauer book that the mask hasn’t even read.